Home Lifestyle I’m convinced my brother’s son is mine — now my wife can’t...

I’m convinced my brother’s son is mine — now my wife can’t have kids


Should he come clean? (Picture: Metro.co.uk)

We all make mistakes — but some are a lot bigger than others.

This week we hear from a reader who admits to being ‘single and stupid’ when he ended up having sex with his brother’s wife.

Years later, the affair has been brushed under the carpet, and his brother is still married to the same woman.

But there’s just one problem: our reader is concerned that his nephew might be more closely related to him than everyone thinks.

Before you go, check out last week’s dilemma, from a woman who is starting to wonder if her SAS boyfriend might be lying to her…

The problem…

It makes me cringe to say this, but four years ago I had an affair with my brother’s wife. I was single and stupid at the time, and he found out after just a few weeks. Needless to say, it caused a lot of heartache for all three us, as well as for my mum, whose shoulder he cried on. To this day, my dad doesn’t know.

Mum was instrumental in helping us rebuild our relationship, and although it took nearly a year, my brother finally agreed to give me another chance at being a better brother, and we try to act now as though nothing’s happened.

He’s still married to the same woman, and although I think she still has feelings for me, by necessity our relationship is now very cool. We don’t spend any time together, unless it’s some family get together, where we can’t avoid one another.

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I’m now married to a lovely girl, who knows nothing of what went on. In fact, no one knows except the four of us, as we’ve kept the whole thing secret from wider family and friends.

The problem is that I torture myself, wondering whether my young nephew is really my child. The dates are right and he looks a lot like me.

My wife sadly can’t have children, and I find myself wanting a DNA test so I can put my mind at rest.

Laura says…

‌And then what? Even if your nephew turned out to be your biological son, I doubt you’d be able to ride off into the sunset with your sister-in-law and child to start a happy new life. The devastation caused by such a move would be immense, so unless you’re prepared to inflict a great deal of unhappiness on a lot of people (including you), forget this idea now.

It took a long time and much heartache to repair your relationship with your brother, and frankly you’re extremely lucky that he’s been willing to forgive you. As for your poor mother, she’d be broken, having worked so hard to rebuild the family only for it to be torn down again by you.

You say the dates are right and your nephew looks like you, but you don’t know when your sister-in-law had sex with her husband. Nor is it any surprise that the child shares a family resemblance with you; he probably looks like your brother too.

It feels like you’re really grieving over the sad fact that your wife can’t have a baby herself, but please don’t wreck your marriage because of this. Have you considered adoption or surrogacy? There’s so much support out there for people in your situation – organisations such as Gateway Women or the Fertility Network. Specialist therapy is available, too.

Finally, yes, there are certain companies who will do a discreet DNA test for you. However, you must be over 16 to supply a sample voluntarily, so your sister-in-law would have to agree to provide your nephew’s DNA. My advice is, don’t go there.

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