Home Lifestyle How to deal with your pooing at work anxiety – TechVerdant

How to deal with your pooing at work anxiety – TechVerdant


Leave your poo anxiety in the past (Picture: Metro.co.uk/ Getty)

Doing a poo in public is never going to be the most comfortable experience, but it’s time to deal with poo anxiety head-on.

We all know the sheer panic when you hear someone lock the cubicle door next to yours. The squirming around as you attempt to make sure you evacuation is as quiet as possible.

Most of us spend the bulk of our days at work, in places with bathrooms we have to share with other people. Pooing at work feels stressful because there’s still a big part of us that doesn’t want to admit that we’re human beings who push out waste products. 

But holding in your poo until you’re in the comfort of your own home simply isn’t feasible.

A new campaign by Bowel Cancer UK, the UK’s leading bowel cancer charity, and Andrex, ‘Are You Sitting Comfortably?’ is highlighting the importance of embracing poo chats, and being comfortable when relieving yourself away from home.

The study found that almost half of Brits (47%) have said they feel uncomfortable going to the toilet at work and over half (53%) have held in their poo or urine because they felt too embarrassed. 

The concerning findings come as Bowel Cancer UK found that one in five (or around 6.6 million people) put off speaking to their GP about what they view as ‘embarrassing’ symptoms.

But talking openly about your bowel habits could literally be life saving. The UK is lagging behind in early diagnosis of bowel cancer, with only 14.4% of cases diagnosed at the earliest stage, 10% less than other European countries. 

What are the symptoms of bowel cancer?

Bowel cancer is the fourth most common cancer in the UK and the second biggest cancer killer, affecting both men and women.

Every 15 minutes someone is diagnosed with bowel cancer. That’s nearly 43,000 people every year, nearly 120 people every day. 

Bowel cancer is treatable and curable especially if diagnosed early.

The symptoms of bowel cancer can include: 

  • Bleeding from your bottom and/or blood in your poo
  • A persistent and unexplained change in bowel 1q 
  • Unexplained weight loss
  • Extreme tiredness for no obvious reason 
  • A pain or lump in your tummy

Most people with these symptoms don’t have bowel cancer. Other health problems can cause similar symptoms. If you have one or more of these, or if things just don’t feel right, see your GP.

Pooing at work anxiety is common, but it’s crucial to tackle it. Everyone poos, remember? And sometimes that has to happen at work.

Here’s how to get a little more comfortable ‘using the facilities’ at work.

1. Listen to music while you do it

Using the toilet in the office will never be the most comfort (Picture: Getty Images/iStockphoto)

If you can’t hear it, you don’t have to worry about any noises you’re making – and you can pretend you aren’t making a hint of a splash or toot.

Listening to music while you poo distracts you from obsessing over how much noise you’re making, meaning you can relax and unleash rather than desperately hovering over a toilet seat while angling your butt just so.

2. Don’t hold it until you’re desperate

Putting off pooing is a terrible idea.

It’s bad for your body and your stress levels, as you’ll only end up rushing to the bathroom and nearly crying when you see all the cubicles are taken.

Go when you need to and don’t tell yourself you can hold your poop in all day. You can’t. You’ll just give yourself cramps.

3. Schedule your poos

Don’t forget everyone poos (Picture: Getty Images/iStockphoto)

If you play your pooing schedule right, you’ll naturally need to go at around the same time each day.

Figure out the situation in your office and see if there are times when the loos tend to be emptier. Usually this’ll be in the morning or around lunchtime.

Keep a mental note and ensure you drop the kids off at the swimming pool within that brief, glorious window.

4. Choose a time when you’re not feeling rushed

Few things are more stressful than trying to forcefully rush a poo that’s destined to take longer than five minutes.

Don’t try to rush things by nipping to the loos right before a meeting or when you absolutely need to be at your desk – you’re only creating time pressure and stressing yourself out in the process.

Go for a time when it’s quiet and you know you won’t be missed if you’re gone for ten minutes or so. That way you can relax, and have a much better pooing experience as a result.

5. If splashing terrifies you, create a barrier

It’s wasteful, so we wouldn’t recommend doing it every time, but a quick way to minimise splashes is to place a few squares of toilet paper on top of the water in the toilet bowl.

This muffles the splash a little. It won’t completely get rid of it, but anyone listening won’t be entirely sure which cubicle the splashes are coming from.

Another top tip: flush as you go. Another way to conceal any sounds.

6. Don’t panic if the cubicles around you suddenly get filled

Don’t worry if someone is in the cubicle next to you (Picture: Getty Images/iStockphoto)

Focus not on the shame of pooing near other people you work with, but the increased pool of potential suspects if anyone wonders who let out a not-so-stealthy fart.

Remain calm, and simply time your exit from the cubicle for when you can hear that more than one person remains in the bathroom area. No one will ever know.

7. Don’t be a d*ck to other office poo-ers

If you’ve wandered into the toilet cubicle to find someone’s forgotten to flush, don’t loudly wonder who did it or run away, squealing.

All you’re doing is drawing attention to the poo, hammering home the message that pooing is a horrible, shameful, thing.

If you want to poo without fear, you have to contribute to a culture that lets people poo in peace – a culture that accepts that pooing as a natural thing that’s not to be shamed.

Flush the toilet, say nothing, move on. Be nice and create the world in which you want to live. A world in which pooing at work is no big deal.

8. Remind yourself, over and over again, that everyone poos

You are not weird or gross for needing to poo at work. Everyone does it. It’s nothing to be ashamed of.

Repeat this like a mantra every time you nip to the toilet, and realise that it’s really not a big deal if you make a noise.

People are aware that you are a human person. Therefore, they’re aware that you poo. It’s not a big secret and you won’t be shunned forever if anyone ‘finds out’.

9. And remember that when you poo at work, you’re getting paid to sh*t

Always a great motivating factor.

10. An important note for all embarrassing things: No one cares

Think about how you react when you see one of your coworkers nip to the toilets. Do you loudly hiss, boo, and tell everyone they’re going for a dump?*

*If you do, you are awful. But you probably don’t.

No one is that bothered about what you’re doing that they’re tracking your movements, listening out for signs that you’re doing more than peeing, and waiting for the moment they can reveal to the world that you produce faeces.

People are much too busy worrying about themselves to even consider your pooing habits.

11. And know that when you’re comfortable pooing, you’re helping others to be comfortable, too

The moment you stop worrying about making a sound, people in other cubicles will realise it’s okay for them to audibly poo, too.

That means you’re doing some good – through the power of poo.

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